Monday, January 27, 2014

Modeling for Our Kids How To Live in Magnitude

In  A Course In Miracles, we are encouraged:

"Be not content with littleness," "Littleness is the offering you gave yourself," "You offered this in place of magnitude, and you accepted it."  

Whenever I'm with my brother-in-law and I ask him if he wants something, his response is:
     "I want everything that is coming to me."

I love that!  Whether he is aware of it or not, he is living in magnitude.  If we settle for less in our lives, we will surely attain it, but if we know that we deserve better we will  attract better because we will live our lives expecting the best for ourselves.

This goes back to releasing our past and giving ourselves permission to live the life we choose, not the lives that our ancestors or our parents lived.  What messages did you hear growing up?

  • We can't afford that
  • We may not have a lot of money but we have love
  • We are _____________ (insert any job) and that's all our family will ever be
  • Negative messages about affluent people and things they have
If we are to model magnitude to our children, we have to change our language.  When we do this... our children will be raised expecting all great things to come to them.  They will stop expecting less.  They will start dreaming and believe that they can attain those dreams.

Modeling Magnitude For Your Children:
  • Use positive messages with your children:  "You can be whatever you want to be."  "If you dream it you can be it"
  • Take field trips to places that inspire and uplift
  • Engage your kids in service to others
  • Go for your own dreams and talk to your children about it ( starting a book, taking classes for your inspired career, connecting with your artistic side, taking dance)
  • Talk about yourself in a loving way 
  • Emphasize that your child is worthy and so are you
Living in magnitude starts in our minds and in our speech.  Once we align with our inner magnificence we will have the most abundance lives that we can imagine!

Wednesday, January 22, 2014

Parenting While Texting

We've all seen it; a family disconnected while sitting together. It occurs in restaurants, office lobbies, cars, and in their own homes.   While texting has become an immediate way to connect with our children; which seems like a great thing... as with all things we have to pay attention to the balance and to what other connections we have lost along the way.

There is great value for us to reach our kids by just pushing the send button.  We are able to receive emergent messages, offer support, and/or protection to our kids with a click of a button.  The concern comes when our children stop seeing our eyes connecting with theirs.  From the first time their eyes are able to focus and they see a parent's smiling eyes looking back at them, a relationship is being formed. Over time, that connection will either build or diminish based on how we nourish that bond.

Reactive attachment disorder is based on a child not bonding or attaching to a birth parent.  We saw it first when children from other countries who had been raised in orphanages and not spoken to, cuddled or nurtured by a birth mom.  In the states, our own children are being born with attachment issues because of a disconnect between mom and fetus because of depression issues, drugs, and most recently, due to parents spending less and less quality face time with their kids.

Our kids are being raised by the school system, daycare, other relatives, and often by television and the internet.  Parents are grateful for the electronic baby sitters and will routinely allow their face time to diminish while kids are spending most of their after school hours in their rooms with their televisions, game systems and other electronics.

Balance is key.  We all enjoy getting immediate answers trough an Internet search and having access to our loved ones quickly.  Texting cane be the most optimal way to connect with your kids while they are out and about, but please be aware of building a bond first and making sure that you have meaningful face time with your child every day!  If that relationship is not nurtured and your child always sees you texting while answering their questions, or spending all of your time with them in front of your computer, you are missing out on the most important relationship you have right in front of you. You have the power to nurture a child and create a life long bond.  That will enhance your life, but it will also bring a child into alignment with their own value.  When you look on them with loving eyes and spend time with your child; you are letting them know that they are worthy to be loved.  That is key to their success.

Bonding Activities:

  • Fix their breakfast
  • Eat meals with your child and look at them while you talk to them about the day ahead or the day they have had
  • Play board games
  • Attend their activities; and watch... so that when they look over at the stands they see you looking at them
  • Have open dialogues with your kids on the values you hold
  • Put positive notes in their lunch boxes
  • Turn off electronics and have family time that you make a priority
  • Snuggle time before bed
You are the single most important bond your child will make.  Be mindful of the time you spend with them.  Set your intention to be there emotionally and physically for your child.  You will never regret it and the connection you make will remain in their heart forever.

Sunday, January 19, 2014

Model Compassionate Self Love For Your Kids

When you talk to yourself.. what words do your children hear you say?  Children want to be just like the adults that they love and will mimic our words, facial expressions, mannerisms, and attitudes.  Our kids are bombarded with images in magazines, television, and the Internet that makes it impossible to get a clear picture of how to love the skin they are in.  You are the first voice your kids will hear.

If they hear self loathing, lack of confidence, and belittling of yourself in your voice, your children will learn to talk down to themselves.   It is important that you recognize how you speak to yourself and when you are putting yourself down so you can challenge those words and change them.  A belief, after all, is just a thought you keep thinking.  If you change the thought, you can change the feeling, and then the behavior.

Who told you that you weren't worthy?  How did you learn that the person you were created to be didn't measure up?  Learn to challenge those messages and don't allow those old tapes to play in your present moments.  You deserve to be loved and to love yourself.  You are a divine creation that is loved unconditionally from Source and you deserve to love yourself in the same way.  If you find that hard to believe, then you have bought into those old messages and need more than ever to work through the old trauma.  Once you do that, your life can get back on track and it will in turn benefit your kids.

When you choose to love yourself and model that for your children, you will see them begin to love themselves.

Compassionate Activities:

  • Immerse yourself in  positive books, workshops, and images  
  • Connect to a spiritual practice
  • Consider meditation 
  • Eat a healthy diet
  • Exercise
  • Give yourself permission to speak only compassionate words to yourself, and make sure your children hear those words!

Namaste (My spirit within me bows to the spirit within you)